Wednesday, October 22, 2014

We have a five year old in our midst. 

Sagacious and silly, fascinated with all things involving nature, fierce battles, Bible stories, food, and how old everyone is. He is an exuberant learner and can spout off poems such as The Vulture, Little Things and The Friendly Cow. He whizzes through handwriting and math pages in sheer happiness and can sound out words with increasing rapidity. But his favorite activities are to construct elaborate lego creations, grab some favorite weapons out of his armory to reenact some epic kerfluffle (often while wearing a superman cape), draw pictures of epic battle scenes, or scrounge for food.

Living up to the reputation that comes with a name like Will James, William displays his talent as a cowboy artist with a portrait of John Wayne. Other favorite art subjects include Rumblebuffin the Giant, David & Goliath, and birds.

He is our conversationalist, and can keep up a running dialogue on any of his favorite subjects (see above) for hours on end. 

He knows how old most people are in our church and will often greet them with this riveting information. Once, after letting him play at the zoo playground for about 15 minutes, he came up to me and quickly reported the ages of all the other 10-15 kids playing there. He then proceeded to walk around and announce these statistics as he passed each one: "You're 4! You're 5! You're 9!". 

He is a wealth of information and a total ham. He adds a good dose of hilarity to my daily life.

Here are a few "William-isms" that have made me laugh in the past few months:

"Some kids are poor, they don't have legos."  

"I'm going to name my kids Saint George, Ketchup, Betchup & Snog."

At a program at the Nature Center, the teacher asks if any of the kids have nicknames. William raises his hand and volunteers this information: "My nickname is Saint George."

To his friend Robert: "Are you a Dodson?" (Robert answers an emphatic "Noooo!")  
"Then what kind of people are you??"

Margaret: "You said you were going to be a knight and fight Komodo dragons."
William: "I changed my mind. I'm going to be a cowboy and a cook."

Later, he requests that I buy him a harp when he gets older, because he wants to be a shepherd.

A bow and arrow was one of his prized birthday gifts. He has shown a natural propensity for it with excellent form.

Displaying his Missouri farm boy heritage:

At a Springfield Cardinals baseball game, William asks how much longer the game will last. 
Clay responds: "We're a tic over halfway done."
"Is it just the size of a little tick? Is that how much is left?"
And later.... "That took as long as the size of THREE FAT TICKS!"

While eating at a restaurant William studies the deer antler chandelier hanging above him. Then, turning to me... "Are John Deers real?"


Being a doting big brother:

"Susannah! You're so sweet! Your shoes look like Indian shoes! And your clothes look like a flower! You're the sweetest baby in the country!"

In an effort to make his little sister laugh, William puts gravel on his head and waits for a response. Susannah obligingly giggles hysterically.
Me: "Susannah thinks you're Hilarious."
Smiling a huge, very pleased smile:
"Who is he? Is he someone who puts rocks on his head?"

And a doting son (with a definite taste for gourmet food...)
"Do you know you don't know everything?"
(dramatic pause)
"Except about cooking... You know everything about cooking."
Then later, while eating an unusually elaborate dinner that I had prepared:
"This is as good as marshmallows! ....It's as good as hot dogs!!" 

"I know why they are called Lucky Charms..... Because when we get them we are lucky."

"I love cereal too much. ....I love you too much."
Me: "Do you love me or cereal more?"
"I love God best."


In the car, Margaret reports: "We are going South! And that is East, and this North, and that is West."
William excitedly interjects: "West is where John Wayne lives!!"

William comes to me sobbing, so I ask where it hurts...
"It hurts where you grow a mustache when you grow up." 

In somber reflection:
"Mama, when I was in your tummy I thought I was going to be a great man. 
I thought I was going to be a giant."

Showing promise as a budding biologist:

"I'm not cold, because I'm a warm blooded snake!"

Driving home late at night, we are greeted by our german shepherd.
William exclaims: "Look at that nocturnal Athos!"

We love you, William. May your next year continue to be filled with much joy, laughter and wonder.